October 2009

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Jump My Bones

Well, it’s that time of year again when everyone pulls out their sluttiest outfits and goes door to door offering tricks for treats. Halloween is so porn.

Don’t we all love to dress up and be someone else? Behind the mask, there are no consequences.

But Halloween is really about frightening ourselves. Terror gets your heart pounding, your pulse racing. You’re all panting breath and adrenalin coursing. It sets off in us that fight or flight instinct, and opens us up to our most animalistic behaviors. It forces us to face that most primal of multiple choice questions: Fuck it or kill it?

And horror is ultimately about facing our fear of death. It causes us to seek out comfort and the reaffirmation of life, generally in the form of sex. “Horror movies turn on chicks faster than porno.” And sex has always been a constant in the genre. There is the sensuality of the vampire who comes calling at night like a mist through our window, stealing into our beds while we sleep. The werewolf encourages us to give in to the beast within. Witches of were long thought to engage in sex with Satan and his minions, and often they represent a woman in complete control of her sexuality (ooo, scary!). Ghosts and demons possess us and make us do wicked things.

So give in to your masochistic desires – go find yourself a good scare on this Halloween. And then go hide under the covers with a good fuck.

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Thanks to Sebek for enabling my laziness.

Ckazaal: gimme something to do. something to look at or look for
Sebek: oh
um…
ooo, how about some xray porn?
Ckazaal: xray porn? what’s that?
Sebek: where they use xrays or infrared imaging to see through people’s CLOTHES
Ckazaal: does that actually exist?
Sebek: it might not
but they have xray machines at UK airports now
they can see through your clothes
to check for weapons
Ckazaal: link
Sebek: OMFG YES
Sebek: that’s hot
Ckazaal: yep, that’s pretty much it on xray porn, except the mri thing i already posted and a bunch of stuff about fears of child porn with the airport scanners
Sebek: i want that job
Ckazaal: the airport scanner job? So you can get into child pornography?
Sebek: ha
Ckazaal: have you seen what the images actually look like?
Sebek: not any with a penis, but i want to
Ckazaal: link and link
not very sexy imo
Sebek: that is so hot you’d be able to visualize people naked so easy   Ckazaal: oh, found some pics
link and link and link
Sebek: nice
Ckazaal: hehe: link
Sebek: HEHEHEHE
Ckazaal: i like that her tits are actually spalding basketballs
Sebek: it’s grotesque.  she’s grotesque
Ckazaal: well, they can’t all be blowjob xrays
et la pièce de resistance:  link
Sebek: oh jesus.  some people
Ckazaal: maybe i’ll just cut and paste this conversation into a post.
Sebek: no shit
Ckazaal: cool with you?
Sebek: you totally should
wait.  no, i forbid you
this conversation is between you and me
it’s special to me
Ckazaal: ah, fuck it. i’m doing it anyway.

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Birthday Suit

Today I turned 29 for the fifth time.  To celebrate, I found you all this nice birthday porn.  I feel great and I’m riding my sexual peak.  Enjoy this holiest of days, as I know you will.  I’m certainly looking forward to my birthday sex.

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My latest porn pet peeve: men who leave their socks and/or shoes on while filming. Yeah, I know there are some practical reasons for wearing them, but dude, your black calf-length socks against those legs that have suffered a long, hard winter underneath your blue jeans? Not a turn-on.

BTW: Sorry for the lack of postiness lately. I’m right on the edge of finishing the first draft of my novel, and have been a little focused on that. Soon I will be able to give you my full attention again, this I swear. At least until NaNoWriMo, that is…

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